We found a man, ancient beyond all belief. Having been thawed from his glacial purgatory, the caveman had trouble adapting to contemporary life. Either he had transcended the red dust of this world and would not deign to aid us, or we could simply could not make heads or tails of the grunting and hooting that he used as language. Either way, our search ended in dismal failure. We had no choice but to return to the kingdom in abject defeat.